Your perception of me is a reflection of you ; my reaction to you is an awareness of me

Indian culture is a culmination of devotion ,discipline , and respect . If we put this with an example it would be easy to understand . Indian female almost constitute half of the population. Despite the fact , rules and customs of Indian culture is most strictly to be followed by females.A few years back one of my married friends caught her spouse in an extra marital affair . But as usual being an Indian religious girl she had to carry forward her relationship with dignity and respect . Later ,she was selected as a senior teacher at a co-education school in her area.

                         Now as a teacher , irrespective of gender , she must maintain harmonious relations with her colleagues . But this thing pinched to her husband , and he started forcing her to quit her job.This reflects that the perception of her husband was based on his orthodox thnking and male dominated stuffs . Thorugh previously she faced grave issue wirh her husband , her reaction was her long drawn so called 'Indian Sanskar'.

                         This episode underlines the fact that our perception is mostly associated with our upbringing ,culture , and society. Whatever we  feel or perceive is the essance of our feeding . To illustrate ,Mohit having  a negative opinion about Abdul is hardly based on what Abdul said or did , rather  it is only proof of what kind of negativity Mohit is carrying inside . We all spend so much time worrying about how other people will react to us and trying to adapt our own values , lifestyles , and personalities in order to feel accepted by others.

Dimensions of Perception 

  Perception has two dimensions first is Social and second is Practical. Social dimension is part of our character and personality adopted from family , society , religion, performances, regulations and historical events. For instance, consider that you are a Hindu and from the very beginning of your life it has been taught to you that Muslims  are harmful for your nation or society. Later, if you get posted to an area where you face any communal issue  between Hindus and Muslims then your social instinct will put you in a cynical perception consisting of hatred and anger towards Muslims.

                   

                 As opposed to social dimension , the practical dimension of perception is built by our experiences , life events , lessons , teachings etc. IT helps to mould our  perception according to situation and condition. For exemple , you have a strong friendship with someone, but some people want your relationship to break away and they keep on poking negative points about your friend. But as you know that your friend always stands for you , helps you in your cause and makes you happy when you are sad , so you have a strong  positive and healthy perception towards your friend which took several years to carve.In this  situation you are not affected by anyone's perception.

    

  Don't Judge a Book by it's cover

          Everything others do or say first goes through the prism of our own experiences and the final input we get in our mind is already tainted by who we are. This means that , if we form an opinion about someone, our opinion will be : one part input we received from them ,and the other part input of our mind . Human brain stores a lot of information and it is a very complex machine ,so the way we see someone could be affected even by how our day went before meeting that person and what kind of mood we  were in when we first spoke to him/her.

         

                  People from first impression of other people almost instantly.The way we speak,walk, and gesture can affect the way people react to us and how they perceive our intelligence levels. THE PROBLEM IS THAT THE LENS THROUGH WHICH WE PERCEIVE IS OFTEN WARPED IN THE FIRST PLACE BY OUR GENETIC PREDISPOSITIONS , PAST EXPERIENCES PRIOR KNOWLEDGE , EMOTIONS, PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS,SELF-INTEREST, AND COGNITVE DISTORTIONS.Our perception is often biased ,selective and malleable . Even our desires can affect what we see by impacting the way we process visual information. The biasness of our perception translates into our reaction and depends on the extent we are self-aware. Dealing with people effectively means recognizing this tendency in ourselves and learning to challenge it when necessary. This is what self-awarness means.

Awareaness as the tool for Appropriate Reaction 

Swami Vivekanand once said ,

           "AWARENESS IS A SIMPLE ACT OF ACKNOWLEDGING THE REALITY AS IT IS."

For he believed that an uncultured man loves the pleasure of his senses but as he becomes cultured , he begins to love intellectual pleasure which has inclusive heart that thinks about others too. This awarness can be brought  into practice when one moves from reactiion to response. Awareness just requires a little effort to pause for a moment  and use  our mind  to give an appropriate reaction.

            

                     In order to be aware , we do not need something extraordinary but by simply practicing it consciously can help. All our beliefs , attitudes , and views are a part of how we approach new things in life  and evaluate new people and new circumstances. Simple steps like not assuming our perceptions to be reality and  not holding it too tight, being respectful of others ' perceptions [they may be right ] can bring a huge change . A little courage to challenge our perceptions and alertness to seek out validation from credible sources can help to build a strong self and more acceptence of others just as they are. Keeping in mind that our perceptions may be faulty ,or incomplete may help us be more flexible in  our views , giving us more peace and contentment . Wabi-sabi is a Japanese concept that motions us to constantly search for beauty in imperfection and accept the more natural cycle of life .

         Most misunderstandings in the world could be avoided if people would simply take the to ask ,"What else could this mean?"

         --------> SHANNON